Living with BiPolar Disorder
An excerpt from LIVING WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER Strategies for Balance and Resilience
by Lynn Hodges
Publisher’s Note:
In this excerpt, Lynn Hodges describes one of the first major episodes of her manic behavior and how she learned to accept the upside. It’s funny, heart-wrenching and reminds us family, friends and sufferers that those who live with Bipolar Disorder are not alone.
One of the things I found difficult to accept when reading about other people’s experiences was the extreme negativity about the illness they experienced. But it’s important to remember that after every down there is an up and this condition can help your creativity. In my mind, there is no doubt that bipolar disease and creativity are linked, and whenever you feel isolated, which you often can, it is good to be reminded of this.
The real reason for feeling alone is that it is hard for friends and loved ones to understand your bizarre behavior. When you are depressed, friends look at your life and do not understand why you feel so low—to them you have everything. The reality, of course, is that an important brain chemical, or neurotransmitter—serotonin—is not getting to the brain. So, like a diabetic without insulin, you are unable to operate effectively.
As a reminder that you are not alone, here is a list of just a few well known public figures who
with bipolar:
Russell Brand Actor
Frank Bruno Boxer
Richard Dreyfuss Actor
Carrie Fisher Actress
Stephen Fry Actor
Paul Gascoigne Footballer
Catherine Zeta Jones Actress
Graham Greene Novelist
Ernest Hemingway Author
Vivien Leigh Actress
Spike Milligan Comedian
Ozzy Osborne Singer
Edgar Allan Poe Poet
Ruby Wax Comedian
Your behavior can be so irrational that you worry about rebuilding good relationships with colleagues, friends, and families. Real friends are always there for you, but you may be surprised to find that there are some people who, unfortunately, just can’t cope with your diagnosis.
It is not surprising, considering the behavior that can accompany this disease. I only remember a few of the crazy things I did in the lead up to my manic episode in 2004 whilst I was living with Kay. They could test anyone’s patience.
For example, I had a compulsion to throw away as many of my sister’s things as I could—from TV remotes, candles, and clothes to toilet brushes. I would see them and say to myself that she would be better off without all this clutter, then they would end up in a black refuse sack that I would put outside her door! I also went on a car rampage. One night, I took my children and my sister’s son Sam out for dinner. On the way home, I decided that I no longer wanted to be me, so I threw my passport, check books, handbag, and Kay’s house keys out of the car window as we drove along the A20 at 80 mph.
OM Times Magazine » syndicated
