Blessings In Disguise
By Mary Cook, M.A., R.A.S.
When we are committed to personal growth, we understand that everything we experience is a means to enlighten us on our life journey. It is easy to be grateful for events that stimulate positive feelings, yet it is usually the painful experiences of our life that elicit the highest healing and the greatest blessings.
The “gift of desperation” that people in twelve step programs talk about is their gratitude for the pain and suffering that led them into recovery. Problems and stress continue to visit us however, and we are not generally thankful for the opportunity they provide for us to learn and grow. When we expect to be in charge of what life brings us, we will feel victimized. When we accept the mysteries of life, we realize greater possibilities of growth. When we give external caretaking more power than internal caretaking, we will feel empty. When we balance internal and external nourishment, we feel fulfilled.
There are natural consequences that manifest from our dominant thoughts, feelings and actions. When we are not moving in a healthy direction, negative internal and external signals indicate this. When we ignore the early warnings, the signals escalate. Thus the more mindful and reflective we are, the earlier we can intervene in our own creation and progression of problems.
Spiritual growth is an alchemical process that changes negative thoughts, emotions and actions into their positive counterpart. This is typically what addicts attempt to do with compulsions. True transformation however, is not a defensive process. It is the truth that frees us from darkness, not denial, running away or fighting.
We must appreciate and understand what holds negative energy within us and in our life, and see the root problem below it. The origin of negative energy is always a part of us that needs healing, understanding and love. Reacting superficially to symptoms and defense mechanisms increases negative energy, leading us further away from a healthy solution.
When no-one has heard or understood our pain, and darkness is our dominant experience, we communicate this through negative actions against ourselves and others. Our own defending and offending behaviors and attitudes reinforce fear and negativity. Our need to protect ourselves from chronic pain leads us to disengage with our true self and with others. We are stuck here until someone helps us to see our higher truth.
When our defenses finally cannot withstand the pressure of our pain, we become more aware of the magnitude of our confusion and failure. Additionally if we have sufficient hope for a different solution, our gift of desperation allows us to reach out for help.
OM Times Magazine » syndicated
